It’s more common than you think to freeze when it’s time to speak English.
I don’t know if that’s comforting or just frustrating. But you’re not the only one who feels this way.
You want a quick solution. While I can’t promise that, I can offer some questions and tips that help my students speak more easily.
(And I’m not just going to tell the Spanish speakers to “perder la vergüenza.” We both know it’s not that simple.)
Let’s get into it.
Why do I freeze when I speak English?
Think about a moment when your mind went blank.
Maybe it was during a meeting, in class, or while on vacation.
💭 What were you trying to say?
💭 What was happening around you?
💭 How did you feel in that moment?
Don’t judge your answers. Just notice what comes to your mind.
What am I telling myself in that moment?
Sometimes, the hardest part isn’t the silence… it’s what we say to ourselves in our head:
💔 “I always freeze.”
💔 “I never remember the word I need.”
💔 “My English is horrible.”
Sound familiar?
These thoughts might come up a lot, but are they really true?
When you’re honest with yourself, you might remember:
💕 You did speak up in that meeting once.
💕 You have remembered that word before.
💕 You are learning and improving.
These words are truthful and supportive. They can make you feel more confident, and they help more than saying something mean or negative.
If you want to practice using kind words to talk to yourself, here’s a blog post by Dr. Melissa Parks about how to take a self-compassion break.
What can I try next time?
Think about a future conversation. What’s one small thing that could help you feel more ready for it?
You could try:
💡 Preparing 1 or 2 phrases. Here are some you can try from this blog post.
💡 Saying something like, “just one moment,” to give yourself time to pause and think.
💡 Practicing a short version of your answer out loud at home.
💡 Taking a slow deep breath before you speak to help you relax.
Write down any ideas you have. There’s no right or wrong answer. It just has to be something that works for you.
Are you ready to go deeper?
Sometimes, in my 1:1 classes, we talk about what’s really happening when these blank moments occur.
For some students, it’s:
✨A belief that they don’t know enough vocabulary.
✨A memory of a teacher who embarrassed them.
✨A fear of making mistakes.
✨A time they forgot a word and felt ashamed.
These moments can stay with us. But they don’t have to control us.
This is the kind of work I love: helping students understand why they freeze and building ways to feel more comfortable speaking.
What now?
Next time your mind goes blank, remember that moment. Later, you can come back and ask yourself the questions above.
And give yourself kindness instead of criticism.
Want to work through these moments together? Join me for 1:1 English personalized conversations or check out my group classes.
We’ll focus on what you need most – mindset, confidence, and making English feel easier and more natural for you.
P.S. Know someone who would love these tips for moments when they freeze up speaking English? Share this post with them and talk about what you’d each like to try next time. 👯
